The Paradox

I’ve read in other blogs how difficult it is to properly spoil the one you love when you aren’t feeling well.  I have found this to be very true.  Over the last 2 weeks my children have gotten sick, I’ve gotten sick and I’ve been extremely tired from working my new job.  I get home much later than before and only get a few hours of sleep on the nights I work there before I have to be up to watch the children as my wife heads off to work.  It’s left me feeling weak and pathetic.  I don’t enjoy feeling week and pathetic.  My poor wife has had to deal with us all being sick at different times and has worried about my lack of sleep.  The house has fallen into disarray despite her hard work at cooking, cleaning etc.  I almost feel like all the hard work I’ve put into the last few months has been erased and I have to start over (the house work part, that is).

On the other hand, I had an amazing night with my wife on Sunday night.  Finally rested and feeling better we had a delicious dinner and wine and conversation and caught up on our favorite TV show, which is how we usually like to spend our Sunday nights.  Anyway, after dinner and desert we relaxed a bit and she seemed to enjoy asking me to get her things (without my having to prompt her).  She had a genuine smile on her face as she asked me to get up and get her a drink.  I was more than happy to do so! 

I offered a foot rub and she eagerly agreed.  I asked if she would like me to use lotion and at that moment she realized that she actually had some special “foot lotion”.  I have to say that using the lotion was great, I think it made it more pleasurable for both of us.  I commented to her how much I had enjoyed rubbing her feet and mentioned that it was like “making love” to her feet.  I probably should have said “sensual” but I implied “sexual” (which wasn’t completely untrue, but misleading).  She then asked me if I had a “foot thing”.  I assured her I did not.  I’m not averse to feet, but I do not have a foot fetish by anymeans.  I explained that I had a thing for her, not her feet.  I told her that after 2 weeks of no sex (do to the illness and tiredness etc…) I just really got into massaging her feet.

After a while she led me to the bedroom.  After several minutes of kissing and touching (quite passionately) she gave me the lightest pressure that let me know she wanted me to go down on her.  I was very eager to!  After a few minutes of oral pleasure she let me know that she wanted me inside her.  After two weeks of wanting entering her was a heavenly experience.  I lost myself inside her and I can’t remember the last time I heard her moaning so loudly. 

She asked me to go down on her again and I did so with gusto, although a gentle gusto, lol.  I could tell she was close, and normally she wants to cum with me inside her, but it seems like this time she was so into it she couldn’t bring herself to stop me.  So as her moans gained in volume she brought herself off grinding on my tounge.  Then she said “Now”!  I quickly entered her and began thrusting.  She continued to cum and she slowed me down until I layed still deep inside her as she writhed in orgasmic bliss.  Eventually she tapped me on the shoulder and squeaked out an “OK”.  I got off of her and she continued to writhe around for another minute or so.

She told me that she couldn’t remember ever having an orgasm like the one she had just had.  She said it had just kept building and going on and on.  It made me so happy to give her such pleasure and I let her know it.  I kissed her some more and stroked her arms and back and asked her if I could cum.  She seemed a bit taken aback and said “I thought you didn’t want to”.  I felt as confused as she was.  “I don’t, but I do”, I poorly explained.

Oh, the paradox of submission, lol.  After 2 weeks without an orgasm I hadn’t even expected to last long enough for her to cum before me, and since she had cum first, she tried to give me what I want, which is to be allowed to please her without reaching orgasm myself.  Only I do want to cum.  But I don’t.  Ahhhhhhhh!!!  Where does it end?  So I thought about it a bit and explained that I guess I needed some kind of guideline to follow, so I suggested what I see written in many FLR sites, the 3:1 ratio.  I told her that I wanted her to cum three times before I could cum.  I saw concern creep into her eyes and assured her that I didn’t want to try to make her cum 3 times in one night (she insists she can only cum once).  I told her that if it took a week before she reached 3 orgasms than that was how long I had to wait.  I hope she embraces this as she has slowly come to enjoy some of the other aspects of my adoration. 

Monday was a bit of a busy day for me and I didn’t really get to spend much time with my wife or family, despite the holiday.  I did get home in time to relax a bit with her before she went to bed.  I felt a bit guilty because it quickly became clear that she had worked non-stop all day to clean the house.  The kitchen was clean and the floor was mopped.  She was surrounded by folded laundry and there was another basket yet to fold.  I ate and we talked (I had worked through dinner and hadn’t eaten since lunch).  Too soon it was time for her to go to bed.  She seemed tired, so I didn’t expect more than a kiss goodnight from her.  After her bedtime rituals (flossing, brushing, etc.) I found her in bed.  I sat beside her and she asked if I would come “keep her company” for a while.  I needed no more encouragement.  As she rolled over to fix her pillow and get comfortable I stripped in record time, lol.  “That was quick”, she noted.  I was rock hard very quickly as I had refrained from masturbation after our super hot sex the night before.   It didn’t seem right as my wife had tried to please me by denial, so I decided I could wait longer.  She was clearly fealing very frisky and asked if I thought I could make her cum like she had the night before.  I was very eager to try.  Compared to Sunday night the mood was less “passionate” and more “immediate”.  I eagerly went down on her and she was ready for sex before long.  As I entered her she seemed a bit startled.  She said that she couldn’t remember the last time I’d been so hard.  Either could I, lol.  Then again, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d gone 15 days without cumming!   The sex was incredible and soon we were both on the brink of orgasm.  Unless I slowed, however, I was sure I would cum too soon.  I told her I was close and she told me to cum.  I did, and I was a bit suprised by the feeling.  It wasn’t the usual series of contractions.  Instead it was more of a feeling of relief than pleasure.  Instead of contractions it just felt like release.  It felt like it had been held back for so long that in the end as soon as there was a relaxation it all just burst forth on it’s own.  For a moment I was confused by the lack of climax.  It wasn’t bad, it just wasn’t what I was expecting.  But I couldn’t stop to think about it very long, as my wife was grinding away beneath me and spreading her legs.  I went down on her and she writhed and moaned as I made love to her with my mouth.  She cried out and rolled over.  Again she seemed to have one of the most intense orgasms ever.  When she had settled I told her that at one point she sounded like she was in pain.  She said she almost was, but in a good way.  She also expressed her pleasure with my new techniques.  I’m not sure what those techniques are, lol, but I’m glad she’s pleased.  Perhaps it’s just that she is starting to “appreciate” my desire to give her all the pleasure she deserves?  I hope so.

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