The State of Our Union…

Is freaking AWESOME!  OK, that’s a bit cheesy, but I’m glad to know that my worries were mostly unwarranted.

We went out Friday night for a low-budget, but delicious dinner of burgers and fried things with a couple of adult beverages.  We talked a bit about our jobs and what-not.  It was nice and relaxing and the burgers were really good.

Afterwards we headed out to a bar we hadn’t been too in a long time.  On the way there we passed a different bar we hadn’t been to in a long time.  This wasn’t too amazing as we don’t really go out to bars anymore except occasionally on date nights, but those are usually restaurant bars for dinner and drinks.

Anyway, we stopped at the other bar for a drink instead.  Inside it was fairly empty and we found a table off by ourselves where we could talk.  I asked my wife how she thought our arrangement was going and she told me she was very happy with it.  She did admit, however, that much like me, she felt like over the last couple of weeks she wasn’t really giving it her all.

We talked about how it shouldn’t be “work” for her, but she explained that there were things she wanted out of it that were things that required a bit of effort on her part and she hadn’t been doing that lately, for various reasons.

One of these things is the assignments.  She enjoys sending me my assignments via email because it gives her a chance to exercise her dominance that doesn’t come naturally, but that she enjoys.  By writing to me she has time to phrase things exactly as she wants and set the tone she wants, which still requires effort on her part, but it’s something she has found that she enjoys. 

She told me she knew I was being lax as well, however not in the house cleaning department.  She was happy about my work there.  I guess I’m just used to this amount of work now, and without the assignments I felt like I wasn’t doing enough.  Anyway, she said she wasn’t sure, but was willing to bet that there was a certain part of our original agreement that I wasn’t following. 

I wasn’t sure what she meant and looked at her quizzically.  She explained that she didn’t think I was keeping up with my one hour of work a day towards my career goal.  This is actually true.  I started out making an effort, but have found that with the constant distractions from the children it really just wasn’t practical, and in fact frustrating.  This was good for neither me or the children (who wants a cranky dad?).  I didn’t make excuses, and she told me that she felt like she should have been more encouraging.  Not demanding or punishing, encouraging.  This is something she wants me to work harder on and she felt like our arrangement might help out in that department.  Instead, after the first week of frustration I actually forgot all about it.

We also talked a bit about the differences between how we started out and where we are now.  She mentioned the things that I said I wanted in the beginning and I explained that those were just fantasy things and I didn’t really know what I had wanted, and now we understand that it’s only about what she wants.  Any fear I had of her only being interested in the housecleaning was way off base.  She made it clear to me that her favorite thing is the sexual aspect of the arrangement. 

She, like me, was a bit bummed out at the lack of opportunity for intimacy over the previous couple of weeks.  She has grown accustomed to being able to use me for her pleasure whenever she wants and relishes the un-reciprocated orgasms.  As she put it, “I love that I can have as many orgasms as I want, and if I’m done and your not, well, sucks to be you”!  Of course it doesn’t suck to be me.  It pleases me immensely, and she knows it.

She did surprise me a bit, though.  When we talked about what else she might want out of the arrangement she told me that she would love to be bossy with me and sit around giving me orders.  The problem is that by the time the kids are in bed and we’re settling down she doesn’t feel able to shift gears.  She feels like she needs time to get into “bossy” mode.  I can understand that.  Once again, it not something that comes naturally, but something she thinks she can have fun with.

I suggested that perhaps we choose a weekend or a specific day to “play” and that way she can slowly build up to it and be ready when the opportunity arises.  She agreed that might be a good way to start.

We also talked about my orgasm control.  I had requested not to have to endure the dart game again and my wife wasn’t sure she wanted to try using the merit system again either.  She isn’t sure what she wants to do to determine when I should be allowed release.  I suggested some other game of chance where there isn’t the possibility of going so long, but she told me she had to think about it.  She is enjoying it, but she isn’t sure how to proceed.  I told her that in the end it should be something that she is most comfortable with regardless of what I say or feel.  I’ve been able to embrace leaving all other aspects of the arrangement to her, but it’s hard not to give my two cents about the orgasm control.  I really don’t want to have to wait that long again.

After our drink we decided to head home.  We hadn’t been out long, but we figured the kids should be asleep by the time we got home, and that would allow us to have our date at home.  Unfortunately we were wrong.  The oldest was still up.  We got him back to bed and sent the baby sitter home.  We then relaxed and talked a little while until we were sure our son was asleep.  Then it was time.

My wife took me to bed and asked if I was ready.  I didn’t need to answer.  It was pretty obvious.  My wife had me start out by going down on her.  I didn’t expect to be down there very long.  It seems like on nights where I’ve been allowed release the oral is just to get her ready.  This was not one of those nights.  She kept me down there for quite a while, and after her first orgasm I was worried that I wasn’t going to be getting any intercourse that night.  Normally after an orgasm she is too sensitive for my mouth any more.  But, again, not that night.  I continued to please her with my mouth and she writhed in pleasure.  She began to have a second orgasm, and at this point she wanted me to enter her.  She was so wet I could barely feel her.  I’d never felt her that way before.  She had me hold still and “rode” me until she came again.  I continued to be amazed at the lack of friction.  I told her that I’d never felt her so wet and she looked me in the eye lustily and told me “it’s because you just made me cum three times”!  With that look it didn’t take me long and I came within moments.   I asked her if she’d like me to make her cum again with my mouth.  She thought about it and said “not tonight”. 

I rolled off her and laid back feeling relieved that everything still worked.  It wasn’t the best orgasm ever, but it was over.  Maybe it was a great orgasm.  It was hard to tell.  I was feeling pretty fantastic about the clearly amazing three orgasms I’d given my wife.  My orgasm has a hard time competing with that.

I didn’t have long to rest before my wife told me to get her a glass of water and a towel.  “You made quite a mess”.  I can only imagine. 

Saturday and Sunday were great days.  Saturday night my wife was tired so went to bed early.  Sunday night my wife asked me to meet her in bed.  I gave her some time to get ready before joining her.  She asked me if I’d like to help her cum.  I stripped and got in bed.  We kissed and touched for a while before she pushed me down.  After a few minutes she pulled me back up and I entered her.  I followed her lead and made love to her how she wanted.  I was losing myself in her and hoping for another orgasm until she said “OK, I’m done.”

Oooooh!  Used again!  Just what I love.

6 Responses

  1. I really love your blog and your relationship with your wife. It is what I am striving for in my relationship. Keep up the great work. It inspired me to start my own blog. I hope someday to make it as interesting as yours.

  2. I really envy you in that your wife uses you for her pleasure. I would be interested in your ultimate Wife-led Marriage. When would you say your mission is completed?
    Keep up the great blog!

  3. It’s so great that you can openly communicate with your wife, thanks for sharing your experience with us. Your wife seems to have taken to the denial aspect of your WLM very easily for which you should be grateful.

  4. Thanks for the kind words everyone. I’m glad to know that I’ve got people reading my blong that really enjoy it.

    As for “mission completed”, well, I’m pretty happy with how things are going. I think for the most part we’ve created an arrangement that makes us both happy and fullfilled and creates a better envirinment for our family. So, in that sense I guess you could say “mission completed”.

    On the other hand, I’m sure this will continue to evolve as we grow and situations change, so it may never really ever be done.

  5. Wow. Great blog. I’ll keep reading if you keep writing 🙂

  6. […] to my wife that perhaps she might enjoy being “bossy” this weekend, as she has mentioned she would enjoy.  She thought it was a good idea and agreed to give it a try.  Well, for one […]

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