Her reaction to my jealousy of the inanimate object

Last night my wife and I had to fill out some very boring forms online.  At one point she got up and left the room and I of course opened another window on the computer and googled “bullet vibe”.  I wasn’t trying to be sneaky or anything, I was just curious about prices as I’d nearly purchased one earlier in the day from JT’s Stockroom.  When she returned to the room I closed out the window and we went back to what we were doing.  I’d piqued her interest, though.

When we were done she decided to do some “window shopping”.  I told her about my near purchase earlier in the day but had second thoughts because of the price of shipping and whether or not I should check locally first.  Since I’d done the shopping at the Stockroom I’d figure we’d start there.  To be honest, we finished there as well.  I think she was a bit overloaded by the choices.  There were several times where she gushed over some huge dildo and made me feel a bit inadequate and jealous.  In the end she decided against “upgrading” or buying a new dildo and told me to go ahead with the purchase I had selected earlier in the day.

As she was leaving the room I asked her what size dildo she would want if I were to buy one for her in the future.  I knew I was setting myself up for disappointment, but I asked anyway.

“Oh, BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG!”, was her response. 

I asked her to be more specific, dreading her potential response.  I was afraid she was going to say, “If it’s not 10 inches then what’s the point”, but she didn’t.  Instead she said, “I don’t know… BIG!  Your size or the size of the dildo I have now, how big is that?  Nothing smaller.”

Somehow that was both reassuring and humbling at the same time.  I remember when she first got the dildo she has now.  We’d been dating a few months and she ended up hosting one of those “sex toy sales party” deals for a friend of hers.  She’d felt obligated to buy something so she bought the “Big and Thick” dildo and a mini-cat-o-nine tails.  Back then I felt like a huge stud because she told me the reason why she bought the “Big and Thick” was because it was the closest in resemblance to me.  When I saw it I had to agree (although it’s mostly a symmetrical circle as where I’m basically flat on top and bottom and just wide, but that’s TMI, huh).  Anyway, my point is that I felt like a big stud because my cock measured up to a dildo labeled “Big and Thick”.  Maybe I still should.  But I don’t.  I saw the look in her eye when she looked at the 8″ and bigger dildo’s.  It’s the same look she had when she first told me about having sex with her friend in college who had 10″.  No, she didn’t date him.  Like all her other friends she just wanted to be fucked by a 10″ cock.

I had a point to this post when started, but I have to say I’ve lost it.  Screw it, I’ll just see where this takes me.

Anyway, I was still feeling incredibly submissive because of the “jealousy” thing from her using her dildo to get off while I was sleeping.  As we sat watching TV together I told her about it.  She seemed to be a little excited by this and asked if I felt a little humiliated as well.  I told her I did.  She also corrected me.  She didn’t ONLY use it in the morning.  That night she had allowed me to masturbate in another room for five minutes before I had to mop the kitchen floor.  It turns out that while I was doing that she was again using the dildo on herself.  The idea of limiting me to five minutes of masturbation without orgasm while she got fucked by a dildo turned her on immensely.  It also became apparent that she enjoyed the effect it was having on me (jealousy/humiliation). 

It really seems as if the more submissive I am the more dominant she will be, which makes me feel more submissive, which makes her act more dominant, etc…  The more we talked the more she ordered me around.  Eventually I asked for permission to kneel and she gave it.  After kneeling for a while she presented me with her feet for a short foot rub.  Eventually it was time for bed, though.

I, of course, was horny as hell and again asked for permission to masturbate.  She asked me how my five minutes were the night before.  I told her it was just enough time to edge myself once and start over again.  Her reply was, “tonight you only get four minutes, then”.

It is really amazing to me how she has been able to keep my submissive buzz going for several days.  A week ago I wasn’t sure I’d ever feel this way again.  I’m such a lucky person to have this amazing wife!

8 Responses

  1. How would you feel if she slept with another? But came home to you and reassured her true love for you.

  2. i read your posts with envy …. you are so lucky … i too wish i had a wife that would see the pleasure in exploiting my submissive side for her pleasure.

  3. ProperLove;

    jeesh, the idea of that would drive me nuts. nothing more submissive for me than that. cuckolding has for a long long time been a hot favorite fantasy of mine!

  4. The fantasy of my wife having sex with another man is exciting, but I don’t think I could handle the reality of it.

  5. Could she handle it? I sure she could. Maybe she could take a bit more initiative and implement the first test or two of mine.

  6. ProperLove, I’m not sure how you found this, but if you were a regular reader you’d know that not only am I not into cuckolding, but it’s been made clear to me from my wife, through a misunderstanding even, that she is not interested.
    I know people really do it, but I don’t see it as very realistic. I don’t even know my wife’s exact reasons why she’d not be interested, but after you take away her fealty to me, and then her religious upbringing (which is convenient to her) and then her sexual hangups, you still have to deal with having to go out and find a guy which puts you in a place where you can be rejected on multiple levels and is really just a huge, unrealistic, pain in the ass situation.
    Yes, I know people do it. We aren’t those people. We are people that are barely scratching the surface of D/s and we are comfortable where we are.

    Having said all that, I’m still curious as to what your two tests are.

    Thank you for your posts. I’d love to hear from you again.

    BTW, that’s not sarcasm. I just wanted to let you know that it’s not going to happen. But I’m interested in you ideas.

  7. Grea post AFH, sounds like your wife is really getting into denial and control. It’s also very encouraging that she seems to be enjoying making you jealous, and even humiliating you just a bit.

    Sounds very promising for the future.

  8. No, I completely understand.

    Here I have published 5 tests for us girls to test our boyfriend (significant other) with:


    I have only gotten around to writing the full description for test 1 ( http://properlove.wordpress.com/2008/09/06/description-test-one/ ). Hopefully I will find time to finish up the further explanations to the following 4 this weekend.

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