Dropping the ball

Well, today hasn’t started out very well.  My wife called to let me know that she parked her car in a two hour spot at work today and when she went to move it the clutch was out.  Now, this in itself is a problem, but it’s an even bigger problem for me because it did the same thing a little over a week ago while I was driving it.  It seemed to make a miraculous recovery so I just figured it was a weird, one-time thing.  I mean, we put in a new clutch less than a year ago.  How could there be a problem with it?

Well, my wife called and she was very upset with me.  She has made it clear that anything car related is to be handled by me so she doesn’t have to worry about it.  I should have taken the car in to be checked out and to make sure that it didn’t happen again.  I’d like to think that I would have if money wasn’t so tight, but that’s not really true.  I just wanted to believe that everything was OK and I didn’t have to bring it in to the shop.

On top of that the oil in my car needs to be changed.  I told her I’d take care of it either yesterday or today after she got home from work.  Well, since I hadn’t clarified with her that I would definitely do it today or not, and now I can’t because we have to get her car to the shop, so she sees me as neglecting this job as well. 

To add to the stress I’m leaving for a business trip in nine days and will be gone for six days.  This will be very stressful on my wife, but I’ve got so much to get done in that time that I’m starting to panic.  I should probably be figuring out my week instead of writing this, as a matter of fact.

Sigh.

I just looked back at the calendar and realised that tomorrow it will be a month since my last orgasm.  Huh.  How did I miss that.  I guess I’ve been even more preoccupied with my trip than I’ve realised.  It’s been eight days since I was last intimate with my wife, as well.  Unfortunately for me she is totally engrossed by the Olympics, so I’m not sure if there is any sex in the foreseeable future at all.

I’ve now been in my device for 26 hours straight (unlocked).  I did chores and ran errands in it yesterday, more so than any time previously.  I’ve actually only had it off for 1 1/2 hours in the last 36 hours.  I woke up an hour and a half before normal and my cock felt like it was being pinched in five different spots with an attempted erection, so I just took it off without thinking.  When I woke up an hour and a half later I immediately put it back on.  The impeding of the erection by the rings isn’t too uncomfortable, it’s the skin getting pinched in the leather that hurts.  It also makes the skin behind my testicles sore as the leather cock ring digs in as my cock attempts to get hard and pushes out against the rings.  Oh, I have been taking it off to shower as well, but that’s only a few minutes time.  I’m still not sure if I’m going to attempt to shower with it on.  I did that once and it just seemed to get too water logged.  We’ll see, I guess.  Otherwise I’ll have to get my wife’s permission to take it off before showering (once she locks it on).  Damn, just writing about this has given me another erection, well, attempted one.  Oh, the straining!

I guess it’s time to get to work.  Enough loafing around blogging.

Father’s Day Treat

I had a great Father’s Day (hope you did too).

It was great for many reasons.  My wife was actually able to combine jobs and relaxation for me, for starters.  One of the kids woke me early in the morning excited about my presents.  My wife informed me that I could go back to sleep and sleep in until brunch.  She was taking the kids out for the morning.  Ahhh, that’s always a nice way to start my Sunday morning.  By the time they got home I was already up and had cleaned up their breakfast mess.  My gifts were set out for me and one was quite obvious.  A new mop.  I love it!  Now, my wife was having a bit of fun with this.  I’d written on the shopping list for the week that I needed a new sponge for the mop and while my wife was shopping (I was at work) she couldn’t remember what kind of mop we had (awesome!) so just bought me a new fancy schmancy mop.  Knowing it would give me a bit of a rush she put it in a gift bag and waited until yesterday to give it to me.  I think this is a perfect example of why this arrangement is working for us.  My wife and I can have fun with it without having to take it too seriously.  I know my wife didn’t get me the mop as a “real” gift, but she was thoughtful enough to present it to me that way because she knew that I’d kind of get off on it a bit.  I also got some new clothes, but to be honest I’m happier with the mop. 

We went out for brunch and then went on an errand.  I did a few chores throughout the afternoon but also got some time to myself for relaxing and playing on the computer.  I helped cook dinner and got to clean up afterward.  It was a pretty great day, I have to say.

Now, before I get all NC-17 I have to tell you that I wrote my wife a letter on Friday.  It was a letter thanking her for things but also letting her know what I’ve been thinking/fantasizing about.  I let her know ahead of time that I wrote it because when we talk at night I never remember this stuff.  It’s not that I was afraid to talk about it face to face, it was just stuff that I either forget or the timing isn’t right, etc.  Anyway, in the letter I basically let her know that I’ve been wanting to indulge in more kinky stuff.  I also explain what things interest me and why, but I make it very clear that it’s just what’s on my mind and if any of it turns her off I understand.  This is a no-pressure deal, just putting things out there.

I start off by thanking her for things she’s done and encouraging more of the same (telling me when she’s disappointed, using my service (which she’s done a lot lately), allowing me to masturbate briefly in bed next to her).  I then move on to basically remind her of the chastity device.  The anxiety is pretty much gone now and the idea of being locked up really excites me.  I know it will be a bit of a challenge, but I think that’s part of the excitement. 

Next I brought up something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately.  During a talk a few weeks back my wife pointed out that sometimes my orgasm can trigger an orgasm in her.  She said this was one of the drawbacks of orgasm control/denial.  It wasn’t too big of a deal, since she’s been having more than ever, but it’s like taking a tool away from her that she sometimes likes to use.  Anyway, I asked her if after her own orgasms if my cumming inside her “did” anything for her.  Did she get any enjoyment from it, aside from the pleasure of making me cum?  I let her know that I’ve been thinking about it and that I knew that I made her “messy” by cumming inside her so perhaps I should only be allowed to do so on special occasions and the rest of the time be made to masturbate to orgasm.  At this point I also remind her of my desire to consume my ejaculate, to put it nicely.

I then went on to tell her that I would like to buy her new vibrators and a dildo.  She has had a dildo since we first started dating and it is very similar to my size and shape.  She never really liked using it, though.  As she put it, “why would I use that when I’ve got a real cock to fuck me”?  Who am I to argue?  Anyway, I point out to her that we’ve been having a lot of fun trying new things and it might be a lot of fun for her to try out a dildo again and maybe there would be times when I wouldn’t be allowed to make love to her but would use the dildo and or vibrator to help her get off while I’m denied.

I finish by reminding her that I really would like to incorporate kneeling into our routine and by her letting me know she is the “boss” more often.

Now, I know a letter like this could seem very overwhelming, but I wrote it in a very “please don’t be upset” kind of way and let her know that it was essentially fantasy and I understood that.  I also told her face to face that I didn’t write it because I was afraid of talking to her about it or didn’t know how to talk to her about it.  I let her know I just wanted to write down what was on my mind so I didn’t keep forgetting about it.

While I was at work Friday night she read it.  She told me none of it was over the top or turned her off.  That was reassuring.  She did tell me she planned on reading it a few more times, though. 

Well, last night she made it clear that she definitely likes some of the things I wrote to her about.  She enjoyed my serving her and relaxed while I cleaned up the kitchen.  She had me refill her water as we watched TV.  She informed me we would be “going to be early”.  That’s when the real fun started.

I gave her a few minutes to get ready for bed and by the time I arrived she was laying in bed waiting for me… and masturbating.  Usually it takes a while for her to get warmed up, but she told me she’d been horny all day.  We kissed while she continued to play with herself.  After a few minutes she asked for her toy (bullet vibe).  I got it out and while she used it I put on my cock ring.  I hadn’t used it in a while and it seemed like a good time to wear it.  While my wife held the vibe to her clit she told me to show her how hard my cock was.  I knelt by her head and presented myself to her.  She sat up and teased me with her mouth for a moment before telling me she was ready.

It didn’t take long before she was moaning and digging her nails into my back and ass.  Eventually I just held still as she ground herself against me bringing herself to an orgasm.  I held her for a few minutes before pulling out.  As she came down from her orgasm I saw her hand grasping around for her vibe.  I handed it to her and she put it back to work.  I kissed her hand and her thighs for a bit before moving up to kiss her beautiful face.  She told me she had the end of the vibe in her pussy while she played with herself.  I asked if I could use my tongue and she let me.  I went down on her and gently licked and sucked her clit while holding the vibe just inside her pussy and against my chin.  Ohhhhh…. guh!  She came hard while holding my head against her pussy.

We lay quietly for a while before she started playing with herself again.  I slowly stroked myself wondering what she had planned next.  As her breaths quickened she looked at me and said, “you can go ahead and cum, it is your day after all”, and went back to working on her own orgasm. 

As I started to masturbate I thought about the letter.  At that point I knew she had at least agreed with this one aspect.  She no longer felt obligated to make me cum inside her.  She didn’t have to worry about getting up and getting cleaned up before going to bed. 

It didn’t take too long before I was at the edge.  I let her know and soon I was shooting all over my chest and stomach.  It had been 18 days since my last orgasm and it felt wonderful (and made quite a mess).  Her moans got louder as I came and moments after my orgasm she was nearly yelling from her third.  She told me that sometimes my orgasm can trigger an orgasm in her, but I don’t think either of us thought it would happen while masturbating!

After we had both come down from our post orgasmic bliss she turned to me and told me to get cleaned up.  I licked some cum from my fingers but went to the bathroom to get a towel and clean off.  When I returned my wife pointed to the floor at the side of her bed.  I knelt down and actually began to get another erection.  HOLY SHIT!!!  She issued me some orders and my head spun in joy.  My wife just enjoyed three orgasms while indulging me in my kinks and at 36 years old I had an erection within minutes of an orgasm.

HEAVEN!

This morning as I got on the computer and checked email I found an assignment for today.  It’s something she’s only recently entrusted to me.  So, that’s all for now as I’m off to wash her delicates.

I know I am truely blessed!

Milestone

100,000 hits and counting!

Wow!  Thank you all for reading my blog.  It really gives me the confidence to keep up with it as often as I can.  Heck, if you leave a comment I’ll thank everyone individually!

In other news:

My wife really seemed to enjoy having me serve her and issuing me orders all of last night.  It’s the most she’s done in one night so far, I think.  Starting at dinner time and ending at bed time she had me wait on her hand and foot.  It was wonderful.

Before sitting down to watch the final episode of Top Chef (technically it was already on, but we were DVR-ing it and like to let it record a while before watching as to skip the commercials) we chatted a bit.  I suggested to my wife that it might be fun to do things she enjoys on Fathers Day.  She was a little perplexed by that, but I explained that it would really be about me since I get off on that.  Well, I didn’t put it in those words, but maybe if I had she would have understood it better.  Then again, we were killing time, so…

Anyway, I also explained to her my problem with last year’s Fathers Day.  I told her it wasn’t really her that was the problem, but the confusion in my own head with what was going on.  The point, however, was to explain how if we were to do it in the context of our arrangement now it would have been totally sexy, and that is what I’m going for.  I’m not sure she totally understood, but I think she appreciated my telling her.

Well, that’s all for now.  She’s given me some chores that I need to get done!

Not really feeling it right now

My wife and I were able to be intimate for the first time in a week last night.  She has been ready for some action for several days but the timing was off and last night was her first chance to get what she was looking for.  There was no hesitation this time in asking for her “toy”, the bullet vibe.  She’s found a way to get her motor running that she is comfortable with.  Frankly I find it sexy and a tad bit humiliating.  Since she’s told me she doesn’t like me to go down on her before penetration I can only sit back and watch.  It’s such a turn on to see her close her eyes, spread her legs and pleasure herself.  I kissed her thighs and her hands as she writhed and moaned softly.  When she was ready she turned off the vibe and teased me all too briefly with her mouth on my erection.  It’s such torture.  I can’t remember the last time she gave me oral.  I mean really, not just the teases. 

I entered her and started slow.  Soon I was following her lead as she worked me towards her pleasure.  After her orgasm she allowed me to masturbate for a few minutes.  I had to stop several times as I got close to the edge.  As she let me know my time was nearly up I was ready to explode and asked her if I could cum.  Of course she answered “no” in a teasing kind of way.  So I sit here this morning with the familiar ache between my legs.

It’s been six months since we’ve started this arrangement, but it’s well over a year since I tried to introduce it.  Last year at about this time I basically gave up on it.  Right now I’m not really sure about it.  It seems to mostly be about cleaning and orgasm control/denial right now.  I’ve been getting very lazy about my housekeeping end of things and obsessing about the OD.  It’s been very hard mentally since my last orgasm.  I know it’s been the most difficult in the days following an orgasm, but this time it’s just been brutal.  I don’t know if it’s the time of year or what.  Something is going on, though.  I’d say that it’s a lack of Dominant behaviour on the part of my wife, but that wouldn’t be true.  She sent me a list of assignments last week and was disappointed in me when I didn’t get them done at the end of the week.  So clearly it’s me.

I don’t want to end or arrangement.  In general it excites me.  But lately I’m just feeling very lazy and I guess I’m looking for a little more stimulation.  Maybe more teasing or more overt control.  Maybe I need some disciplining of some sort.  I just feel like I need something to get my head back to where it needs to be.  I know it shouldn’t have to be work for my wife, but it would help, I think.

Maybe it’s just my clogged sinuses.

A tiny freakout

Sunday night, after a long, mostly fun day, my wife told me to meet her in bed.  I was very eager to join her and soon we were both laying naked next to each other.  I began to kiss her, but she seemed a little… I wasn’t sure, but she wasn’t into it.  I stopped and asked if she was OK and she said she was having a bit of an anxiety attack.  I asked her if she wanted me to stop but she told me it might help her if we just push through it.  We continued to kiss for a while and then I went down on her.  After a bit she let me know she was ready and I moved back up and entered her.  It was wonderful.  She seemed to have moved past her anxiety and seemed to be into it.  I know the area she had her surgery has been very sore so I made sure to keep my chest completely lifted above her as not to put any pressure on her upper body.  After about ten minutes my shoulders and upper arms were tiring out (I need to get back to the gym!) and I decided to go down on her again while my arms recovered.  It turned out that I didn’t need to worry about my arms as she was soon squeezing my head between her thighs and cumming.

As she turned to her side I moved to my part of the bed and slowly started stroking myself.  I looked over at my wife who had her arm across her her face and realised she was upset.  I immediately quit touching myself and asked her what was wrong.  At this point she had a little bit of a freak out.  I don’t remember exactly what she said or the order she said it, but essentially she said that she didn’t like oral sex, there was a problem with my orgasm “schedule”, the timing of our sex is never right, and some other things.  I told her that we could stop it all right now and I’d be fine with it.  She quickly told me no, the arrangement wasn’t the problem.  At that point she started blaming it on herself.  “Anyone else would be happy to get oral sex whenever they want it and not have to give anything back.  Why can’t I be happy with it?”  I comforted her the best I could and she asked if we could talk about it the next day.

Yesterday morning she seemed very happy, but I could tell she was a little worried.  She kept asking me if I was OK and told me that she loved me.  I know she does and I told her I was happy and I loved her too.  I knew she was worried that I’d be upset with her for the previous night.  Of course I wasn’t upset with her, I was just worried about her. 

We ran a couple of errands early in the day and then came home for lunch.  After lunch I prepared for dinner, which would take several hours of grilling on low heat.  While the kids played I sat outside by the grill.  My wife joined me and we talked about the night before.  I again told her that we could stop “doing this” but she told me she didn’t want to stop our arrangement.  She went on to tell me how much better things were this way.  How much happier she was in general, how much less work she had to do, how much she preferred to only concern herself with her own orgasms during sex, “even though it’s selfish”.  I responded, “It’s not selfish if that’s what I want too”, to which she agreed.  She told me the main problem was that she didn’t like oral sex anymore since our youngest was born.  She said her body had changed and maybe it’s also that she is getting older.  I was a bit confused as she seemed to enjoy a lot of oral sex just this week, let alone the last few months. 

“Did you come last night”, I asked.  She told me she did and explained that it’s not that she doesn’t like oral sex, it’s that she doesn’t like to get started with oral sex.  Once we are into it, then she likes me to go down on her.  I have to admit this has me confused, but I think it has her confused as well.  We didn’t come up with any immediate solutions, but I told her I was open to anything and had been trying to think of new things that she might like trying.  I asked her if she might like to start out with her bullet vibe and her dildo.  She wasn’t sure, but I think she is open to try it.  She was never very into her dildo in the past but she told me it was because she had my cock, so why would she use a fake one.  Maybe our arrangement will put a twist on it and it can be sexy for her.

Our talk took place over maybe an hour or so.  Occasionally we’d be interrupted by the kids or one of us would have to do a job related to dinner, so we’d start and stop at various times and pick up in other places.  So after a one of these interruptions I felt I needed to clarify something.  I’ve been a bit worried that the only reason she wouldn’t want to end our arrangement is because of the cleaning, so I assured her that even if we stopped it right now I’d continue to do most of the cleaning since I worked part time and she worked full time.  I assured her I’d still be the “househusband” and that it would just be the “other stuff” that would change.  She thanked me for telling her that, but again told me she loved our arrangement.  She did admit that the extra work I did was a big part of it, but it wasn’t all of it.  She told me about how overwhelmed she was after a youngest was born and how she felt I was adding to her burden instead of easing it.  She feels assured now that she will never have to worry about feeling that way again.  We even talked about me taking on more of the dinner duties.  She loves to cook, but after I surprisedher with dinner earlier in the week and she was able to just come home and relax on the couch while I did everything she has agreed with me that my cooking dinner more often would be better for her.  This will take a little getting used to so we agreed to sit down and work on menu’s and shopping lists together from now on.

Something she wasn’t talking about, but stood out in my mind, was the orgasm control.  I decided to broach the topic.  I told her that I understood if she wanted to stop it, but she told me she didn’t.  She said the problem was that sometimes my orgasm can trigger her orgasm.  She pointed out that in the past, before we were married, we could have sex in about two minutes ending in simultaneous orgasm.  We knew each others triggers so well that we could have “quickies” that left us both totally satisfied.  But, they weren’t really “simultaneous”.  Usually one person’s orgasm triggered the others.  Of course, she can’t predict when this will happen and if I do come and she hasn’t, well that defeats the purpose, doesn’t it.  Now, as confusing as this is, it’s reassuring to know that she still wants to control my orgasms and sees that giving me a release on the off chance it might trigger her own orgasm isn’t really the best solution. 

I explained to her that for me the orgasm control has evolved.  When we first started practicing it the longer I went without orgasms the more difficult it became.  I explained to her how that has now changed for me.  I told her the first week or so was the most difficult as the feeling of orgasm is still fresh in my mind and I think of how great it was to cum once or twice a day whenever I wanted.  I think of how crazy I must be to voluntarily not masturbate.  I continued to explain to her that after about ten days the feelings change.  I get a buzz from not cumming

“Like a runner’s high”, my wife offered? 

“Yeah… I guess it would be like what a marathon runner feels”.  I hadn’t really thought about it that way, but it makes sense.  I told her that I understood her confusion about the whole OC thing, and that I’ve kind of been running it myself as she asked me a couple of times if I “wanted” to cum instead of just telling me to cum or not cum.  I told her that it’s because of this buzz I get from wanting to go longer.  I admitted that I didn’t want to cum until at least the 27th because that would make it three weeks between orgasms.  I went on to further tell her that frankly I didn’t want to cum for the rest of the month, and had been tempted several times to ask her to make me wait until fathers day, which would make it about five weeks between orgasms.  She seemed pretty amazed by this, and I told her that it was confusing for me as well, but often that’s how I felt.  I told her the problem with it was that I shouldn’t really be deciding when to cum and when not to cum.

I think we left this topic up in the air.  Hell, I think we left it all up in the air, except for the fact that my wife doesn’t have any intention of ending our arrangement.  It will just have to continue to evolve.  I have an idea about OC that she might like.  I didn’t bring it up with her, but I’ve been thinking about it for a while.  Actually, I was thinking about it in the context of a sexy OC story, but now I think I’m going to offer it as a suggestion to my wife.  First, for the story, I had the idea that a guy agrees to have his orgasms on the 15th and 31st of every month.  Of course when he agrees to it he isn’t in the proper frame of mind to realise that only seven months have a 31st day.  So, for nearly half the year he only has one orgasm a month.  Sexy.  For my wife and I it wouldn’t be very practical since we quickly discovered that trying to plan a specific release date usually didn’t work.  Maybe I would be at work.  Maybe she wouldn’t be in the mood.  Maybe she’d be out of town.  Either way, it’s not as sexy for us to have a specific day.  So, perhaps we could agree that months with 31 days I would have two orgasms whenever she wanted, and months with fewer days I’d only be allowed one, whenever she wanted.  This is actually a bit scary, but sexy at the same time.

I think the last problem we talked about was timing.  She told me she is horny in the afternoon, either while she is at work or on the weekends when the kids are around so we can’t do it.  On top of that, when we are able to have sex at night, she is often too tired or has had a few drinks.  So, it seems that timing is against us right now. 

I’m sure we hit on some other points, and I think we probably will talk about it some more, but my wife felt better in general having talked about it and thinks that it probably will make her more relaxed and receptive in general.  I hope so, but if not I’m sure we’ll work it out.  If nothing else it seems to have given her a little bit of a charge to her Dominant side as I woke up this morning to an email giving me a list of assignments for the week, none of them very pleasant.

Yay!

Vanilla Quotient

I read a post the other day at Devastating Yet Inconsequential about service submission.  It goes along with something I’ve been thinking about lately.  It’s clear to me that my wife and I have a mostly vanilla relationship.  I was trying to put some kind of percentage on it, which would still be completely arbitrary, but I was thinking about it anyway.  I couldn’t figure out if there was a kink factor to being a househusband.  It’s not mainstream, so that could qualify it as not being entirely vanilla, but it’s not particularly a kink either.

So, I’ve been pondering this a bit and I realised that sometimes it is a kink.  Sometimes it’s just cleaning for the sake of keeping the house clean.  Other times I just don’t feel like cleaning and I fall back on fantasy and think of it as my “duty” to my wife.  That helps motivate sometimes.  Of course, my wife usually doesn’t mind if I skip one of my everyday chores, or rearrange them.  I’m in charge of cleaning so as long as things get clean she isn’t really even thinking about it.  So, it’s not like I fantasize that my wife will beat me if I don’t do it, but it’s still a bit of a fantasy anyway.

Sometimes it’s totally kinky, though, and those are the best times.  Those are the times when my wife takes the children into the family room to watch a movie or play while “daddy cleans up the kitchen”.  Or maybe she’ll take the children to a park and tell me that she “expects” a particular chore to be done by the time they get home.  These times are fun for both of us and they don’t happen all the time, but when they do I know it’s because my wife is having fun with it and she knows that I get off on it a bit.

There are also my “assignments”, my special tasks that she often gives me.  Sometimes the assignments are just extra bits of cleaning she would like to see done, but sometimes they are things that I truly do not want to do.  Not humiliating or painful things.  Annoying things.  Things she knows I won’t do unless she writes it down with a note saying “do this”.  As a matter of fact her habit of leaving me those kinds of chores was one of the clues to me that I had already been living in a WLM without realising it.  Usually they will involve being on hold for long periods of time, or dealing with some other problem over the phone.  I really, really hate those kinds of calls and would gladly pay somebody else to do it.  So, the assignments have a definite kink value.

Now that I think about it, my wife has told me several times that she thinks it’s sexy when I clean.  She was totally ogling me one night as I mopped the kitchen floor and kept commenting on how sexy it was.  Maybe she’s got a bit of a kink for my cleaning.  That would be interesting.

So, how kinky is this whole domestic thing.  I mean, if we weren’t playing around with orgasm control, which is about the only 100% kinky thing we do, would being the househusband be kinky at all?  Does the addition of being in a WLM and orgasm control automatically add a level of kink to a househusband?

I guess since we center most of the fun we have with the WLM around my service that my position as househusband is indeed one of kink.  If you take out the WLM and orgasm control it goes back to vanilla, but since we use it in more of a D/s fashion I’d have to say it’s more on the kink side.

Huh.  It seems so plain and simple now.  Our kinks are basically a WLM where the wife’s sexual pleasure is put first, she decides when I orgasm, she has final word, and I clean.  So, I don’t know…  Let’s say… 70% vanilla.

Feeling complain-y

I talked briefly with my wife about the “shopping thank you”.  I mostly wanted to clear up any confusion over why I told her that she didn’t need to thank me for letting her buy clothes for herself.  I wanted her to know that I wasn’t asking her to be more bossy or more dominant.  I wanted her to understand that I don’t think she needs to request permission or thank me solely because it’s her money that she earned and that she is in charge of the finances and that I know she isn’t frivolous.  She told me she understood and she was glad I cleared it up.  She also reiterated her appreciation of my watching the children while she was out.  That was a legitimate ‘thank you’ and I appreciated it.  She did point out, again, that she wishes being a bit more bossy in her tone and statements came more naturally.  She was just raised to “please and thank you” everything, but gets pleasure out of the more dominant tone when she is able to do it.

Frankly, I’m continuing to find her natural dominance in more subtle ways.  She really doesn’t need to sound bossy when she asks me, “did you actually clean the bathroom” after I requested that she inspect it.  She wasn’t being bitchy or bossy.  She just asked in a matter-of-fact way.  Clearly I had not done a good enough job.  There was no punishment, just her pointing out things that I missed that should have been obvious.

Speaking of cleaning, my cleaning assignments have picked up this week due to houseguests coming this weekend for Easter.  As usual it’s members of my wife’s family, two male cousins.  While scrubbing the toilet a few minutes ago I experienced a new feeling.  Well, maybe not new.  I guess it was just a combination of feelings that I haven’t felt before in this context.  It was a bit humiliation and a bit anxiety, I guess.  Here I was cleaning the toilet for my wife’s two male cousins.  My alpha ego was raising to the surface and I was starting to feel like I needed to get a bit macho.  There is no way I’d want these guys to know about our arrangement.  I started feeling competitive.  It’s really the first time I’ve felt this way since my wife and I started this.

I’ve got a lot more cleaning left to go, but I knew I needed to settle down so I decided to sit down and write about it a bit before getting back to my chores.  It doesn’t make it any easier knowing that we haven’t been intimate since Saturday, and it’s been ten days since my last orgasm and we won’t be able to be intimate again until next Monday at the soonest.  That is assuming my wife will want to be modest while guests are here for Easter.

OK, enough whining.  Time to get back to work!