Busy Busy

Well, things have been very busy around here.  I’m out most nights working right now so we have had very little alone time.  We are trying to make the most of our together time, however.  We are trying to spend more time with the kids actually doing things instead of just sitting around the house.

Unfortunately that means we haven’t had the time to get into any kinky action and still have very limited intimacy.  To top it off I’m kind of in an “Alpha” mode as I’m working nights with my partners.  It’s very difficult for me to switch between the need to be a more dominant personality at work and a more submissive role at home.  I’ve decided to just accept it and when the bulk of the project is finished in a month or so I’ll be able to get back to a more normal routine (hope hope hope).

I can tell my wife is getting a little aggravated about the situation, but I think she knows it’s temporary and likely unavoidable.  The house work is suffering but I’m trying to keep up with the yard work.  She also seems to be a little more testy with me at times and recently snapped at me.  She had pointed out that I had gotten another doctor bill that I had been told to take care of.  I pointed out that I had taken care of it and had told them we would be mailing in payments.  She snapped at me about needing to tell her these things.  I’m fairly certain I had, but I knew better than to talk back.  The toughest part about that was that I wasn’t in any kind of submissive mind set so initially I felt angry.  I didn’t say anything and I don’t think I showed any anger, but I didn’t like feeling that way.

In the past I’ve talked about how chastity effects me over time.  Well, that seems to have changed recently.  Before I seemed to be really horny for about ten days after a release and then the horniness would taper off and eventually be replaced by a nearly overwhelming desire to not orgasm.  After waiting five weeks this last time I of course was praying to be made to wait at least six weeks or even two whole months.  My mind was in an incredibly submissive state and the night of my release my wife was being very dominant and a bit kinky.  When she finally allowed me an orgasm I felt a “drop off” for the first time.  All sense of submissiveness was gone.  I didn’t want to do anything but just lay there.  It was horrible!  For the next 10 days where I’d normally be super horny and thinking about having another orgasm most of the time I instead didn’t even think about it.  I didn’t feel horny and thoughts of cumming again didn’t even cross my mind.  Then a couple of nights ago it seemed to hit me out of the blue.  The last two days I’ve been incredibly horny and I’m starting to feel more submissive again (although as I said before it probably will be suppressed as I finish this project).

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Quick arrangement chat

Well, we were able to have a short talk about our arrangement last night.  I started by expressing that it seemed like the arrangement seemed to have, I forget what word I used, but I think something along the lines of mellowed maybe.  Anyway, my wife disagreed.  She said the arrangement is what it is, the problem was that we weren’t very connected due to how busy she had been with work and how busy I’ve been and the kid activities going on and now that our oldest is on summer vacation from school they are staying up later, etc…

In some ways this was a relief to hear, despite the fact we were talking about a complete strain on our relationship.  Her point was it didn’t have anything to do with the arrangement.  All aspects of our relationship have been effected.  

I told her that I wish I had gone out of my way to be more helpful, but honestly felt that I was going through a period of depression.

I also brought up the lack of sex and asked if it was because she was getting all she wanted and that was it, or if it was lack of time or what.  She was a bit surprised to realise we’ve only had sex 7 times this year and said that we needed to work on that as well.  Once again time and stress have taken a toll, but my wife assured me that in no way did she intend to only have sex once a month.  She too would like to be back to at least a couple of times a week.  Whew.

We didn’t talk for very long, but we agreed that we needed to put more effort into our relationship and since our arrangement is a big part of that hopefully we will be back to where we were in no time.

 

Side note – 

I’ve been wearing my device a lot lately.  I’ve really grown to enjoy the feeling, especially when I get excited and feel how it restrains my erection.  It’s damn sexy.

And for the OC/OD fans I need to make a correction.  I’d previously said that I’d only had 6 orgasms for the year (I think).  I’ve actually had 7, but haven’t had a release for 31 days now with no opportunity until at least 35 days.

Getting back on track

Well, it looks like we may be on the road to recovery.  We still haven’t really talked about the current state of our arrangement, but at this point I’m not sure we really need to.  I think we both see that we just haven’t been putting enough effort into it to make it fun for both of us.

The renewed effort started shortly before dinner as my wife pointed out to me that the dish washer needed to be unloaded.  “That’s YOUR job”, she pointed out to me.  At dinner, and through the night she seemed to have me get things for her more than she has recently.

Finally she had me come to bed with her where she had her way and when she was done I was left lovingly denied (that’s four weeks without release for those counting).  As she put it she “took what she wanted” and was done.  I got dressed and went to get her some water and medicine.  I returned to the room and handed them to her as she sat in the bed.  

“Wouldn’t you rather be kneeling”?  It was more of a statement than a question and I think kind of sums up the recent situation.

Hopefully we can continue to get back on track.  It’s going to be very difficult over this summer as I’ll be working most nights and two nights a week I’ll be working very, very late into the early morning.  It will leave me tired and cranky and stressed.  Perhaps on my few nights off she’ll be using me as she sees fit.  I certainly hope so.